The everyday life of an everyday woman with a passion for writing, and a dream… Mommeeeee! I need help wiping! Oh yes, and five little kids.

Munchkin Maxims

The joys of parenthood entail the joys of the wonderful things our kids say.  Here are my munchkin's maxims.


(Discussing with the kids how there wasn't internet or computers at school when I was in elementary school)
AM: You had to learn everything from BOOKS?!

Mom: See, isn't Pennsylvania so much prettier to drive through?
H: Umm...Mom, it's just a bunch of trees.

Mom: A, you need to hurry in there. Grandma needs to use the potty
A: She can hold it.

A: I got mad skills!!!

C:Mom, are you pregnant?
Mom: No
C: Because it looks like your pregnant.
Mom: It's all that candy I've been eating.
C: Well, you better stop.  Even if there was a baby in there, it would be born wild!

(After falling down)
C: Stupid gravity!!

C: Mom, was I in your tummy when you took AM and W to Disneyland?
Mom: Yes, but you were itty bitty.
W: C, that means you weren't really in her tummy, you were just a bunch of cells.
C: Mom, what is a cell?

(Complaining of a runny nose)
A: The booger juice won't stop coming!

(Sniffing my hair...)
A: Mom, you smell like Utah.

A: Listen to this...'Pork! Mother!'
(For those of you who are fans of  the movie Emma with Gwenyth Paltrow)

(Camping with Gma and Gpa )
AM: This is not camping.  It's like...a neighborhood, with trailers.

(Playing Lego StarWars III)
C: Mom, let me be R2D2 for awhile.
Mom: Why?
C: Because I'm not clumsy like you.

AM: Why can't you teach me? I want to be homeschooled!
Mom: Because we don't feel like that is what Heavenly Father wants.
AM: Why does HE always get to decide?!


A: Is my head glued on?
Mom: No honey
A: But how does it stay on?


(C hugging Dad)
C: Your breath smells like five-day-old mints.

(While I'm explaining North, South, East, and West to H.)
A: Wait!!!! Where's the soggy waffles?

Mom: C, what do you want for Christmas?
C: Snow.  In my closet!

(Santa came for a visit to a Christmas party we attended, and gave the kids each a little gift, after opening the present)
H: Woah!!! I didn't know Santa had tape!!! Cool!

(A coming down in the morning spotting Dad sitting with her blanket.)
A: You better not be using my princess blankie!
(he was)

(H getting his shirt tucked in on Sunday morning.)
H: Now I look like a Bishop!

AM: Rice again?! ugh! I'd rather eat my own blood!
(What?!)

A: Mom we don't say 'What the heck!' We say 'What the mac n' cheese!'

C: Dad, sometimes I watch t.v. and movies in my head.
Dad: Those are called dreams.
C: Ya, and I change the channel like this! (he twitches his head)

(Having pasta salad for dinner)
AM:This isn't salad!!! It's just cold pasta!

Mom: C, you need to eat your dinner.
C: My tummies upset.
Mom: It's upset because your hungry.
C: It's upset because it thought it was having corn dogs!